Joined Together In Love By God
Introduction
“There is no brighter face of God on earth than friendship,” writes Brother Roger of Taizé. Ben Sirach speaks in moving terms of friendship, yet he remains on a superficial level and falls far short of friendship as described by Christian authors. Christ himself made the willingness to die for one’s friends the highest mark of friendship and he put it into practice.
To Christ, marriage is planned by God to be indissoluble. Infidelity in marriage and divorce are against the will of God, whose faithfulness is the model of fidelity in marriage. In this Eucharist we pray for fidelity for our Christian couples and for all of us in our commitments for fidelity to God and our neighbor.
1 Reading: Sirach 6:5-17
A kind mouth multiplies friends and appeases enemies,
and gracious lips prompt friendly greetings.
Let your acquaintances be many,
but one in a thousand your confidant.
When you gain a friend, first test him,
and be not too ready to trust him.
For one sort is a friend when it suits him,
but he will not be with you in time of distress.
Another is a friend who becomes an enemy,
and tells of the quarrel to your shame.
Another is a friend, a boon companion,
who will not be with you when sorrow comes.
When things go well, he is your other self,
and lords it over your servants;
But if you are brought low, he turns against you
and avoids meeting you.
Keep away from your enemies;
be on your guard with your friends.
A faithful friend is a sturdy shelter;
he who finds one finds a treasure.
A faithful friend is beyond price,
no sum can balance his worth.
A faithful friend is a life-saving remedy,
such as he who fears God finds;
For he who fears God behaves accordingly,
and his friend will be like himself.
Responsorial Psalm: Ps 119:12, 16, 18, 27, 34, 35
R. (35a) Guide me, Lord, in the way of your commands.
Blessed are you, O LORD;
teach me your statutes.
R. Guide me, Lord, in the way of your commands.
In your statutes I will delight;
I will not forget your words.
R. Guide me, Lord, in the way of your commands.
Open my eyes, that I may consider
the wonders of your law.
R. Guide me, Lord, in the way of your commands.
Make me understand the way of your precepts,
and I will meditate on your wondrous deeds.
R. Guide me, Lord, in the way of your commands.
Give me discernment, that I may observe your law
and keep it with all my heart.
R. Guide me, Lord, in the way of your commands.
Lead me in the path of your commands,
for in it I delight.
R. Guide me, Lord, in the way of your commands.
Alleluia: cf. John 17:17b, 17a
R. Alleluia, alleluia.
Your word, O Lord, is truth;
consecrate us in the truth.
R. Alleluia, alleluia.
Gospel: Mark 10:1-12
Jesus came into the district of Judea and across the Jordan.
Again crowds gathered around him and, as was his custom,
he again taught them.
The Pharisees approached him and asked,
“Is it lawful for a husband to divorce his wife?”
They were testing him.
He said to them in reply, “What did Moses command you?”
They replied,
“Moses permitted a husband to write a bill of divorce
and dismiss her.”
But Jesus told them,
“Because of the hardness of your hearts
he wrote you this commandment.
But from the beginning of creation, God made them male and female.
For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother
and be joined to his wife,
and the two shall become one flesh.
So they are no longer two but one flesh.
Therefore what God has joined together,
no human being must separate.”
Commentary
Sirach here speaks of the qualities of the true friend. The old adage holds that our lives are full of acquaintances, but few friends. Sirach holds that acquaintances abound, but only one in a thousand is a true friend. He offers ways of determining friendship. It must be tested, lasting, utterly sincere, not discarded at will. It must endure through reversal of fortune and remain steadfast during times of adversity. Each of us knows when those qualities are present. We know who our friends are and are deeply grateful for them. A true friend is a treasure. Our Gospel for today is Jesus’ teaching on marriage and divorce. The fact is that the percentage of marriages today that end in divorce is alarmingly high. But this in no ways weakens the teaching of Jesus; rather it confirms it. The consequences of divorce are saddening. Its effects on children are particularly disturbing. One parent is awarded custody and the other visitation rights. The children find themselves caught in the middle of what is often a very divisive situation. It is not the way nature ordained things. Where there is antipathy or animosity between the parents, it all too often affects the child deeply.
But there is a further consideration: the effect of divorce on society as a whole. A strong family life is essential for community. Every child must mature with the loving presence of both mother and father. A child raised in conflict is often scarred for life.
Marriage begins with friendship. It must be rooted in deep personal ties that will sometimes be tested. This leads to engagement and a preparation for marriage.
All of which says that a couple considering marriage would do well to reflect on Sirach’s teaching today.
Blessing
We admire reliable, faithful love. We find a model for it in God’s love, as exemplified in Jesus. May our love also be strong and faithful, especially in marriage. May God bless you, the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Amen!